Too Long To Tweet I

So you all know that I joined Twitter, right? Well it has become a delightfully entertaining distraction! For those of you who think I am crazy/self-absorbed, I don't think you really get Twitter (at least the Twitter I know!).

I mean, yes, Twitter can be used for endless self-promotion (like "Two hot guys just checked me out at J.Crew!"), or for just informing people of mundane daily activities (like "Just ate lunch. Salmon was too salty."). But that's not what I use it for, and those aren't the kind of tweets I follow.

Instead, I just like to point out the random ironies of life or help promote my friends or favorite shows. And, yes, you may see that as self-serving, BUT for every tweet I write, I read twenty!

I enjoy Twitter because at the (literal) end of the day, I can feel closer to people I care about or admire. It's fun knowing what my out-of-town cousins are up to, or feeling like Seth Meyers (of "Saturday Night Live" fame) is just a Direct-Message-click away. Plus, no one can write more than 140 characters in a Tweet, so it's almost impossible to "waste" too much time on it! It's a brilliant idea (for what it is, at least).

These are probably the same reasons you all like Facebook. I, however, am not on Facebook (nor will ever be - sorry, Dana, Rachel, mom, etc, etc, etc!).

All that to say: I love Twitter. There, I said it! It feels so good, I'll say it again: I love Twitter!!

Anyways, that wasn't supposed to be the point of this blog entry. I guess it's easy to get sidetracked when you love something. :)

I have found that sometimes I would like to Tweet about something, but try as I might, I can't get it within the 140-character limit. So, thankfully, I have a blog for those stories! Here they are, in no particular order:

Stories Too Long To Tweet
(that have happened since I joined Twitter)

1. I went to a local home-improvement store to look for ceiling tiles for my basement. One of the guys there helped me find some. I remember him asking for my name as I went to look for other patterns in another aisle. About a minute later, I met him at the front desk and noticed that he spelled my name correctly on a piece of paper. I was amazed! I told him that nobody ever spells my name right, and he said, "I asked you how to spell it", and, clearly not remembering that, I said, "And I answered you?" He looked at me like I was nuts, and said, "Yes, and I wrote it down." How could I have completely forgotten an exchange that happened 3 minutes earlier?
(660 characters)

2. When my mom and I visited my grandpa in Detroit, we noticed a hosiery store right outside his neighborhood. We decided to check it out and it was awesome - basically all they sell is different types of nylons (zebra-print, lime-green sparkly, Psalm 23-themed). While looking at their vast "pink" selection, I asked the owner, "Do you mostly sell to dancers?" He answered, "I try to do business with dancers only over the phone. Most of the people who come into the store are church-going or have small children, so I try to only keep family-friendly merchandise in the store." It took me a second to realize that he thought I was referring to strippers when I said, "dancers"! I quickly said I knew there was a ballet studio down the street that he probably gets a lot of business from! Awkward alert!
(805 characters)

3. My students often complain of being tired, and the other day I casually told one of them just to run out and get some coffee. Later on, I recalled that when I was a freshman in high school, I saw my friends drinking coffee for the first time and I cried a little worrying about them. No doubt my reaction back then was likely due to the famous caffeine-pill episode of "Saved By The Bell". I didn't want any of my friends to end up like Jessie! And just look at me now: a coffee pusher!

(491 characters + youtube link)

4. I have been telling everyone about my new nephew Daniel Luca. Surprisingly, a lot of friends, upon hearing the news, ask, "Does that mean Dante and Olga get the $5000 [that my mom once promised us kids for the first legitimate grandchild with a normal name]?" I had completely forgotten about that deal! I asked mom about it and her response was, "Oh right. Well, 'Luca' is not really a normal name..." That was a sad cop-out, mom!
(430 characters)

5. One of my good friends from college, Derek, was in town recently interviewing for a new job. He ran into my brother Davidde at a friend's dinner party. Derek, who has met Davidde several times through me, said to him, "Ciara will be so mad that we're having dinner without her!" Davidde apparently shrugged it off with a confused look. A few hours later, Davidde realized that Derek was referring to me (his sister!) and not his friend Chiara, who pronounces her name the same way I do. Why am I not the first "Ciara" that Davidde thinks of?! Are there any "Davidde"s out there I can be friends with so he can see how confusing this is?
(640 characters)

If you enjoyed reading those stories, but wished they were shorter, please check out my Twitter page. :) Although I will completely understand if you don't want to, or even if you still hate Twitter. I am just glad you're here!


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